The dog barks at midnight and other nonsense
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A few weeks ago I learned that Tuesday is the day for random items in the blogosphere. Thanks for that tidbit Lin. So as you might surmise, today we’re going to jump about with no rhyme or reason.
But now I want to randomly throw in rap phrases in this post like, that shit is wack. Maybe today I’ll have rap Tourettes.
That’s weird because almost everyone who commented said the commercials were still running in their area with Billy at the helm.
I’ve noticed throughout the book the main character, Sean Drummond, frequently uses the word, “Nonsense.” As in bullshit, that’s not right — nonsense.
I think it jumps out at me because it feels like an old, sanitized phrase from the 1950s and yet I find it oddly compelling. I want to start using it in my every day life but I don’t talk to many folks outside of my house. Further, I think it will lose its punch if I have to constantly explain to my kids what it means.
Speaking of phrases, when Emily picks out her clothes in the morning I usually tell her, “Excellent choice.” I find that phrase amusing and use it regularly. Apparently Emily enjoys it as well but gets her thesaurus on when employing it.
The other day she joined me as I picked out my workout clothes. When I set my pants and shirt on the bed she looked at me and said, “Perfect choice!” Way to get jiggy with it, Ems.
So here’s what I saw. A man and a woman were found dead in bed together. The woman was married to someone else, I can’t remember if the guy was married; clearly they were having an affair. They were both naked and both of them had a gunshot wound to the head.
After the investigators were done taking pictures of the scene they began to bag the bodies. When they removed the pillow covering the guy’s hand they found his hand wrapped around a gun! That was a surprise.
Dr. G speculated that the woman’s disgruntled husband — love the word disgruntled — shot both of them and then placed the gun in the guy’s hand.
Aaand that is when I fell asleep.
So that’s all the randomness I have today. Peace out.
“Maybe today I will have rap Tourettes.” Best line of the post. I am still cracking up over here.
Yep, we still have Billy Mays here in Cali.
Can’t help you with Dr. G. Now I want to hear how it ends though!
Man, the rest of the nation is pretty harsh when it comes to the late Mr. Mays. Even the OxiClean website has a picture of him with his birth and death date and quick epitaph.
I am dying to know how that one ended also. And while we’re chattin’ about it, the other story that night was about a 39-year-old chick who lived a clean life. According to her grandma.
Dun, dun, DUN!
Turns out she was a super heavy coke user (huge hole in her septum) and a huge drinker — fatty liver and pretty yellow. The craziest part was that she had a black esophagus. Totally necrotic. (Look at me with my medical jargon. Sweep the Leg!)
Dr. G said she had never, ever in 20 years of doing autopsies seen a black esophagus. Isn’t that crazy? I’m pretty sure she said it was caused from alcoholism although I was starting to fall asleep.
I’ve never seen a black esophagus either, and with just a fatty liver versus a cirrohotic liver, that’s interesting. What did her lungs look like, I wonder.
I’ve seen a black tongue and bit of esophagus, but that was gunshot residue from a suicide.
Pillows are often used as silencers, though I’m sure they would have noted if there were bullet holes in the pillow.
The entire scenerio would depend on the a lot of things I’m sure weren’t mentioned. Trajectory of the gunshot wounds, blood spatter, lividity, rigor, etc.
I don’t remember her mentioning anything about the lungs, but I was starting to fall asleep.
Agreed on the pillow as silencer theory. I’m pretty sure there were no holes in the pillow, but not positive. Based on the position of the guy’s hand and his face and head it seemed unlikely — to me — that his hand would have fallen back that way if he had killed himself.
Especially nestled underneath the pillow.
I wish bluesleepy would get here.
I’ve seen headwounds that did not kill immediately. It’s possible the pillow could have fallen over his hand. I actually saw this poor old man suffering from dementia who managed to shoot himself three times in the head before he died. Sad.
Actually grasping the gun is what tips the scales towards double homocide in my head. You’d think the gun would just be near him if he had shot himself.
Either way, the symbolism is lost on me.
That is a terrible story, Liz. And now that you mention it, I’m sure I’ve seen a similar tale on Dr. G.
The man was in a hotel room and he shot himself in the bathroom (I think) then staggered out to the bed and shot himself again.
Ugh that’s so sad.
Woo hoo! I am number 1! And I live in the pacific time zone! Something good came out of the stupid call from the ER ( I hate being on call)!
Damn straight you’re number one! Hey, isn’t it hard to think logically right when you’re woken up from a deep sleep or are you just used to it and your faculties show up immediately?
I used to just use my cell phone instead of a pager, so would get called directly from ER. I did find it difficult to wake up and probably sounded a bit gargled at times. With my pager I will usually get up and go downstairs so as not to wake hubby (and he does the same for me when he is on call). By that time I am pretty awake (and annoyed. I don’t do well at night.). I then have a really tough time falling back asleep. this AM I was called at 3:30, and never went back to sleep. Augh!!
I’m surprised you are on call with your own practice. Do you get the call when one of your patients ends up in the ER? And what’s the final word on ER?
I’ve read a few medical blogs where they call it ED — the Emergency Department (and they’re sorta snooty about it) — and others that use ER as in Emergency Room.
Which is correct?
Urbandictionary.com is also useful when deciphering rap songs. That is my main resource. it’s also very amusing, as it’s like Wiki and people just add random, cracked out ghetto definitions of the ghetto words. It amuses me. Was that unPC?
Nonsense reminds me of my grandmother saying hogwash typically regarding gossip.
“Did you hear Ethel Sue was seen leaving the package store?”
“That’s just a bunch of hogwash, everyone knows she’s a good Baptist.”
Excellent choice reminds of something a sommelier would say. I hate those guys.
That’s why I think Forensics is so fascinating, so many different variables.
Um, nah. That’s not unPC, just an explanation of the source.
What kind of package store was that? I didn’t realize it was scandalous for a Baptist chick to buy some packing tape.
Oh, seriously? Sorry to be unclear.
Liquor stores are often called package stores down here, or ABC stores. Pretty sure both terms are/were government related. We have tons of blue laws.
That’s wild. But it makes much more sense. Thanks for the clarification.
I’ve seen that one. Did you want to know the end?
I can’t remember why – he was depressed and it was going to have to end or something – but it turns out the dude killed her & then himself. Very big bummer. It was a sad, pointless thing where his depression meds weren’t working. But not as sad as the little boy with ADHD where the pharmacist accidentally gave him methadone instead of ritalin.
Anyway, he killed her, then curled up around her all sweet & killed himself. Bleh.
Now I’m all bummed out. I’m going to have to put on some music, girl!
AUUGGHHH!! That’s a shock, Queen Delite [ :) I love that name btw]. I’m so surprised that the gun remained clasped in his hand and under the pillow. But if Dr. G says he did it, I believe he did it.
Oy, yes I saw that one about the boy and the pharmacist. That was extremely sad and surprising. Didn’t she say the pharmacist closed up shop after that. I’m pretty sure it was a Mom and Pop shop and not a chain.
Yep, that’s what I remember. I would do the same – I would be heartbroken. I felt so sorry for the pharmacist because I pictured the home-town pharmacist when I was growing up (Elbert!) and how crushed he would have been, would never have recovered.
This is one of the reasons I could never handle working in the medical profession. If a mistake I made could kill someone I would be devastated.
A post of random stuff? Sweep the leg, Cardiogirl. Sweep the leg.
Fo’ shizzle.
(laughs) Um, yeah! Sweep the leg!
I use “nonsense” fairly often. I do notice, however, that I only use it when I mean that something is stupid nonsense, as opposed to funny nonsense.
And yet, “nonsensical” is such a “fun” word. And I never get to use that. I’m gonna start.
My mom, now, never said “nonsense”. She said “fiddlesticks”. Only when she was disgruntled. And she would get more disgruntled when we laughed at her for it. Thankfully, Maude was never armed.
You know, it hadn’t even occurred to me to use nonsense in the fun sense. Perhaps I could tell my kids at night to “Stop all of that infernal nonsense and go to sleep!”
I love the idea of a disgruntled Maude.
I don’t remember my mom saying anything like that and she didn’t swear at all. My dad on the other hand was extremely fond of Son of a bitch, which has become sort of old school as I think about it.
He used it as a declarative statement, an adjective and a noun.
Example: (working under the hood of the car) “Son of a bitch! That son of a bitchin’ spark plug is stuck. Son of a bitch!! Get out of there you son of a bitch.”
I haven’t heard that one in quite a while.
i do try to keep up with my hip hop lingo, although street talk is forbidden in my house. every once in a while i get a word in because it’s just too good of a word not to use, but when you have to explain it, it totally loses ALL of its power.
a person i used to work with ended all of his sentences with, “you smell me?” meaning do i understand. i found it amusing and use it on occasion, but only in email.
i like your ghost face killa (sp?) easy killa sounds like you would show mercy, but ghost face killa, well no one would ever see you coming.
i’m off to look up that book you are reading, i’m not even done with the two i’m reading now.
peace and word to thy mother – my version of shakespeare meets snoop dogg.
oh yeah crank is the word i didn’t know what it meant. it can mean anything, eh? i like the word tight. natural’s pants are tight…not meaning nice, but too small around the waist (don’t trip). when she loses weight, she will look tight in her two piece bathing suit. not an overlapping of the belly, but nice.
I love “you smell me?” I will start using that immediately. That’s funny that you only use it in email.
Yeah, I agree. If I’m gonna be a killa I want to be a stealth one. I’m pretty sure I spelled Killah with an H, but the Rap Star name generator gave me Killa with an A. More proof that I need to go with Ghostface Killah.
Love the linguistic marriage of Snoop Dogg and William. And I’ve been enjoying tight as well. I’ve peppered it about town via comments. I don’t want to use it too much, you know.
Hola Cardio,
Ahh rap tourettes..ha ha that is too freaking funny to me. Liz was right for more “urban” euphamisms urbandictonary.com is the absolute best.
Nonsense….interesting going out of fashion term but I think you can bring it back. If you say it few times in company others will start to say it as well and before you know it, pish tosh 1950′s hello 2010!
Oh this is something I use in real life, you know outside of the blogworld. When someone pisses you off and you want to say f*ck off simply give them the stank eye and say kick rocks biotch dueces!
Definitions:
Stank eye = look at someone with hatred
Kick Rocks = f*ck off
Dueces = peace out or good bye
I do think I can jump start Nonsense back into the 21st century. Now I just need to start talking to people out in public.
I do believe I shall quietly say “Kick rocks” under my breath when I send Katie to her room and she screams, “I hate you!”
Kick rocks little girl. Dueces.
I use urbandictionary too, but it is so much more fun to use outdated lingo from years ago–it annoys the crap out of my kids. “Word to your motha” is my fav–it makes Col go ballistic. See? It’s all about annoying the kids more than they annoy you. It’s sick–but fun.
Love the part about annoying the kids more than they annoy you!! I will remember that as my oldest is heading into the tweener years!!
Lin, you’re too legit to quit.
That’s awesome Lin! I can totally see irritating my kid by goofing up her lingo. So far she doesn’t have any, but I’m sure she’ll learn some in fourth grade.
Liz man….you have me signing Hammer now!!!
Funny, I’m seeing parachute pants everywhere I go.
I had two pairs.
[...] else to agree with me and at times will say, “I’m sorry you feel that way.” And then I silently add, “Kick rocks, [...]