The Cardiogirl Randomizer
18 VIPs have spoken »
Ahh, home sweet home. What an awesome homecoming, seeing all of those fun comments late last night! Yeah, that’s right. As soon as we unloaded all of our stuff from the van I ran to the computer and bathed in the light of my comments.
So we’re back and I have my big ole Starbucks coffee mug from Singapore at my side. I have no idea how much that thing holds. I would guess at least 12-14 ounces but I’m not sure.
I can’t tell you how many times I have meant to find out the answer once and for all with a measuring cup.
But every time I think about doing it, I have a piping hot cup of java goodness inside of it. Just throwing this out there — I’ve been meaning to measure the cup for more than eight years. We received a set of two from some friends when our first kid was born. And hands down that has been the gift that keeps on giving. Thank you Paul and Karen.
I will be completely and utterly crushed if (oh God, when?) one of them is broken beyond repair. Because I will go Cardiogirl Medicine Woman on that cup working the super glue with speed and dexterity in an effort to revive my beloved patient.
Once again, I am unprepared to virtually stand here before you, story in hand.
So I guess we’re going to employ the Cardiogirl Randomizer. You’ll get a peek inside my head — randomized thoughts — stream of consciousness style. There probably won’t be a traditional beginning, middle or end, but who does have an end when it comes to thoughts? The dead, that’s who. And I ain’t dead yet.
There goes Mr. C’s alarm upstairs. I wonder if he’s going to get up right now or if he’ll repeatedly hit snooze today. I’m betting he’ll be up in another 45 minutes. He’s not a morning person and we were up late last night.
Oh that reminds me, last night I watched a block of shows about food addiction. One show was called something like, “33,000 Calories Per Day.” And, not surprisingly, was about four people who consume over 10,000 calories per day. One person ate 33,000 calories each day.
Two comments: The narrator called those folks “super morbidly obese.” Doesn’t the adjective morbidly cover it? It seemed like overkill — along the lines of “extra super overly morbidly obese.” There’s a chart that provides a clear definition of obese and morbidly obese. Do we call some women super pregnant? Do some people experience super cancer? No.
Secondly, I’ve seen a few of these shows. Every time a man is shown he is either naked or he has a shirt on that is completely open. Frequently that same man is shown on a paramedic’s gurney covered with a sheet.
Note to the men on these shows: Why not cover up with a sheet when being interviewed at home? I understand traditional clothes don’t fit. No problem. Go with a sheet.
When obese women are shown they always, always have a hospital gown on, opening in the back. So I’m pretty sure there are hospital gowns that will fit. Or, there’s always the sheet.
The dark load is done, I need to throw those uniform pants in the dryer and I need to do it now, because I have to get the kids up for school in 45 minutes. Back now. Did you miss me?
One more thought on the shows I saw last night. It did put things into perspective for me regarding my own body issues. Angsting over seven pounds is not really necessary nor is it helpful in the scheme of things.
Spell check why do you accept int as a correctly spelled word when I type too fast and accidentally add the t to the end of in? Always, I’m trying to type the phrase in the. Int is not a word, spell check. Get your shit together.
To quote Samuel L. Jackson’s character in “Pulp Fiction” (delivered with a loud, irritated and sarcastic tone): “Int ain’t no country I ever heard of. Do they speak English in Int?” BAM! Gun goes off and shell casing falls to the floor.
Just saw an ad for the movie “Wall-E” while proof reading this post. I saw bits of that movie over the weekend. It sucked. Save your money. Don’t purchase it for the kids. It just sucks, plain and simple. Instead, go with Madagascar 2.
No, I have not seen that movie and now that I wrote that I realize it just came out in theaters and is not available on DVD yet. So I’ll amend that. Get the first Madagascar movie instead. And then at Easter get the second one to add to your kid’s collection. Ben Stiller is funny. He is. Trust me, you’ll thank me later.
Woah. Sixteen.
That is how many ounces my beloved and much revered Starbucks coffee cup holds. Damn. That is a lot of coffee.
I just had to google ‘int’ to see if there was a definition for it. At Dictionary.com there was the following definition.
int
1. A common name for the integer data type.
It would never occur to me that it was a word, but then I’m not spell check either.
Welcome back!
Hi joe! Thanks for the welcome. Yeah, I Googled it too and found a lot of companies called INT (all caps) but I didn’t think to go to Dictionary.com. That’s why I have you :)
And I would think int is a shortened version of integer so that doesn’t count Dictionary.com. Just my opinion.
INT is only a word for us programmers…as joe-a-saurus-rex mentions above. I can’t imagine why your spellchecker accepts it, however. Is it possible you have your “language” settings set to Geek instead of English-US?
Wall-E was a wonderful movie :) It wasn’t a great kids movie, but it was wonderful. The animation was incredible. One movie, in the theatres, you should avoid is the Quantum of Solace. What a totally forgettable film (and it uses that stupid jerky camera technique in place of good stunt work…makes me wanna puke). When I saw the latest Bourne flick with Matt Damon, I left halfway through and got my money back. I hate films like that.
You know, Steve, that was it! When I checked my language setting it was, indeed, set to Geek. At least that’s settled.
Maybe I was looking for Wall-E to be a kid’s movie. And look at you stickin’ it to The Man and getting your money back. I admire that, I really do. I know I would walk out without asking for my money. But truly, you can return other things. Why not return the movie you would have watched and get your money back?
That reminds me of Sponge Bob episode. Mr. Krabs was trying to be more generous so the Flying Dutchman wouldn’t steal his soul. So he was offering all of these extras at the Krusty Krab. Eventually he did take everything back. And one of the things he took back was a movie a patron was watching on a TV screen. All of the images went in reverse from the guy’s eyes back into the screen.
That made me laugh. And it made me think of the images from that movie you walked out on. Too bad we can’t erase that part of the movie from your mind as well as returning your money. Maybe in the Year 3000.
OK, get your Sesame Street voice on, then read this…
Today’s Cardiogirl Randomiser landed on “cute” and “funny.”
He he.
It’s so good to be back and I’m glad you enjoyed today’s offering, Cate. (So weird to call you that, but I’ll get used to it.) And I love your English spelling of RandomiSer instead of RandomiZer. So fun and proper. Sometimes I truly feel like a stereotypical gauche American when I see your cute spelling of stuff — like colour.
Welcome back! Wall- E was just OK. Madagascar 2 was cute. I took the kids to see Bolt this weekend and loved it! It really was good. Of course, this is coming from someone who hasn’t seen a grown up movie in close to a year!
I know, I haven’t seen a movie at the theater since Bee Movie with Jerry Seinfeld. And that was still sort of a kid’s movie. Yes, we own it on DVD. You gotta love the Sein, whether he’s playing to adults or kids. I wondered about Bolt; I’ve only seen it advertised because we always have Hannah Montana on.
I have a beloved coffee cup that I’m pretty sure I would die without. It doesn’t even have that much sentimental value, I just love it unconditionally.
While you were watching super-duper extra-bonus extremely morbidly obese people last night, I was on my way to becoming one, watching the Travel Channel’s Hot Dog Paradise, Hamburger Paradise, Fried Foods Paradise . . .
Initially I thought you saw that on the Food Network for sure. But I guess if you’re going to Hot Dog Paradise it would be located on a sunny island in, well, Paradise. And one might have to travel to get there.
Doesn’t the adjective morbidly cover it? It seemed like overkill
Was that pun intended? :D
Would you believe me if I said it was unintentional? I’m sure it was subconscious but I have to say, now that you’ve pointed it out, (clears throat) I find it somewhat clever.
(Knocks over 17 chairs in a domino pattern as she awkwardly leaves the Lounge clutching her right shin.)
16 ounces, Betch?! Holy Joe! (har har) I do not think that I am alone in wondering how many of those freaking things you have had this morning….
Welcome back, Shetbag. I missed you.
You know, Les, this is sort of like the show I watched last night. Eventually they showed the person a table that had everything he or she ate in one day. All together on one table. I feel like I am standing in front of a card table with two gallons of coffee and a quart of Half and Half.
Um, truth be told I drink around (mumbles behind her hand) four or five of those cups. Each morning. God that really sounds bad in black and white. It’s really not that bad.
Well, an interesting side note to all of this is that I seem to be immune to the effects of caffeine. I can actually drink a cup of caffeinated coffee 30 minutes before I go to bed and still fall asleep. Hmm (taps temple) I wonder why?
p.s. I missed you and the Lounge as well, betch!
Hey CG!
I was right there with you watching those shows on TLC while of course flipping back to Extreme Home Makeover and House reruns. I kinda wondered about the super morbidly obese definition myself. Joe-a-saurus Rex inspired me and according to what I found on various medical sites it seems that super morbid obesity is an actual term. Morbid obesity is a BMI > 40, super morbid obesity is a BMI > 50 and super, super morbid obesity BMI > 60. It seems like you get another adjective for every 10 points on the BMI scale. Who knew?
Since I fall into the morbid obesity category and dangerously close to the the super category, I just sat there and compared myself to the people on the show. I can’t imagine letting myself get that bad, but then again if you talked to me 10 years ago I would have said I would never get as big as I am now. Right now, I don’t have any of the associated health problems and I guess I watch those shows in an attempt to scare myself into actually starting to the work necessary to lose this weight. I have tracked what I eat and in general I don’t eat nearly that much. Where I get into the most trouble is that I very rarely exercise anymore. I even have an elliptical at home but it just sits there and collects dust. Oh well, enough whining for now. Sorry for venting.
Hope all is well in the Cardio empire.
Hi Buf!
Thanks for stopping by! Aren’t those shows fascinating? That’s really wild that each ten adds a super to the prefix. Every time I look at it I think “Super-Cali-Fragil-istic-espi-ali-docious Morbidly Obese.”
You must have seen the show that had four people, two women and two men, right? That one woman from England, didn’t look that bad by comparison. I think she was about 360. I mean it’s all relative, but didn’t she seem so much thinner?
You know if I lived anywhere near you I would drive to your house, pay you a decent sum and then take ownership of said elliptical machine, right?
I watched that show too! And as per usual was thinking the exact same thing. Why is nakedness a necessity to show us the size of this person? I think covered in a sheet I would still get it, don’t you? I only watched about half of that show because the concept of eating any of that food was making my pregnant self nauseous but I thought that the entire time-cover up!
Also, for whatever reason I read this post very very quickly like you were saying it very quickly. Perhaps I was thinking you had already drank 2 of your 16 ounce Starbucks cup and were speed blogging or something. Who knows why the mind thinks these things?
One mind, two bodies. I get that the “parts” are covered and technically they can go naked, but I thought the very same thing. I can get a good enough idea with you under a sheet or in a hospital gown.
As I re-read my post I can see how you would speed read it, me being hopped up on caffeine and all. But it truly didn’t seem like I was talking so fast :)
I was watching that show until the fiancee had to go to bed and wanted it off. Oh, well.
I LOVED Wall-E. I think you are selling it short, because you only saw parts of it. It’s a whole package kind of deal – when you see the whole thing, you get a much better idea of the characters and the plot line. (Though I admit it probably is beyond the understanding of very little ones.)
Madagascar was cute, but I’m a movie snob, and I find Pixar movies to be far superior. Other movies can be good, but Pixar (like Wall-E) transcends animation. (Have you seen Cars? …It makes anthropomorphizing cars actually seem normal and not scary… actually, it’s one of my favorite movies. :D)
I’ve long since concluded that most spell checks can’t handle my vocabulary (or my friends and family names).
I will totally back down Rebecca and admit I did not give Wall-E a fighting chance. I walked in when Eve met Wall-E and he was driving around in his house or where ever he lived. Then I walked away.
I never did see Cars, but I did see Toy Story, Monsters, Inc. and The Incredibles. The animation on Monsters Inc. was incredible, you could see each hair blowing in the wind. (Dammit, I just typed int he and spell check missed it. Again!)
Angsting. I love it.
I’m going to set my dictionary’s language settings to Cardiogirl. :)
Alright, regina! Now I just have to convince two or three million more people to accept the Cardiogirl way of life and we’ll get a movement going.
Who’s in?
I actually watched good portions of all 3 shows. I’ve seen the one with 4 people before. Yes, the 360 lb English woman does seem much smaller than the rest and at least she was still mobile. Did you catch the part where they said that she had gained 40 lbs in the last 3-4 months? That’s crazy but I can see how it could happen. I would guess that denial (or whatever) can get the better of someone in her situation. You think, ok I’m extremely overweight but at least I’m not as bad as these other people that can’t get out of bed. Then your frustration with dieting kicks in and you give up trying. Next thing you know you are that person stuck in bed. As you can tell I spend way too much time thinking about it.
In regards to the elliptical, if I haven’t started using the freakin thing by my next driving trip to Sandusky Ohio, I may take you up on that offer. Before you get your hopes up too high, I avoid driving there like the plague, 7-8 hours in the car vs 1 hour in the plane.
I actually forgot about that — that she was the only one who was mobile. So sad to think that there are people who are actually immobile because of weight. Yes, I did hear her say something like 42 lbs. in three or four months. That would be majorly depressing.
I know you’re not driving anywhere near here — especially when it would be eight hours in the car — but I must admit my heart skipped a quick beat at the mere thought of taking that machine on. No pressure. Seriously.
p.s. I don’t know why I don’t just email you directly, but I love when you come back and elaborate on a previous comment and answer one of my questions. I’m like the giraffes at the zoo. Don’t feed me because you will just encourage this behavior.
I just erased my late comment. Dang.
Welcome back, I know the feeling of coming home and running to your computer.
33,000 a day, what are these people eating? Injecting fat right into their bodies.
ROFL at your spell check comment. I always type agreemetn wrong, transposing the last two letters, and spell check won’t accept it. it’s close enough. int!
will save the money on wallE and would love to see M2, that looks good anyway.
16 ounces, that is a lot of joe. i too have a favorite mug I drink out of everyday. would hate to see it broken, but I can just order another one.
Those calories were mostly carbs from the looks of it. The doctor on the show said something interesting — he said the food on the table was mostly beige and there was an absence of colorful fruits and vegetables on the table. Most of the food was fried. And mostly it was junk food. (whispers) But some of it looked tasty.
Hey I like the idea of “int” becoming a personal expletive. And it will be spelled with a lowercase i at all times. Even if it starts a sentence. int.
Loved your stream of consciousness. But now I can’t remember what I was going to say because I’ve also chuckled at all the talk in the lounge! Int would indeed be a great swear word. Not to mention a great inside joke, like “oh, int! I’ve been meaning to write you a letter for weeks and it just aint-int happenint” Be patient with me and the spell check.
I think I’m going to employ int as a swear word here at Cardiogirl Manor, which is not to be confused with the Cardiogirl Empire which is here on the internet. The Manor is the brick and mortar place in which we live. Ooh, we might have a newint typeint of pigint latinint goingint onint hereint, Wendyint!
I drink a lot of coffee too – and it doesn’t seem to keep me up. When I visit, we will have to have a “coffee-off” and see who drinks the most.
You’re on betch! Bring your favorite mug and meet me at Tim Horton’s.
My friend took her boys to Madagascar 2. Apparently it’s nowhere near as good as the original (which I loved). Also, she said Wall-E is better than Madagascar 2. So maybe Madagascar 2 might not be the way to go. Based on what she says.
We don’t have kids, but my fiance liked Madagascar so much that he bought it. We also own all the Shreks and both Ice Ages. All good movies for adults, too. Oh, and my favourite would have to be the animated version of The Grinch Who Stole Christmas.
That sucks when the good parts of the movie are in the commercial advertising the movie. That’s a let down, Krista. We have all of the Shreks, too and they are pretty darn funny. And I’d forgotten all about Boris Karloff’s voice in The Grinch Who Stole Christmas. We do need to own that one. Don’t you love his dog?
[...] Hurray! I jumped up and down with glee and then I moved onto the next thing I had to do that day. And promptly forgot the title of the book. Int! [...]
OMG. I was reading today’s (12/9/08) post, and I just clicked to find out what “int” meant.
Jaysus, Merry & Yoseff.
Don’t ever talk about how long my posts are again (if you’re one of the ones who does) if you have nothing to say and take 3 days to get to the nonexistent point.
That being said, I enjoyed this post immensely, LOL!
Wasn’t me complaining ’bout your posts, chick. Glad you enjoyed meandering through my random thoughts. I know, it’s hard to follow, but sometimes it’s fun. Even for me.