The book of questions, Volume 3959 VIPs have spoken »
Friday is The Book of Questions Day around these parts.
Today’s question comes from the aptly titled book “The Book of Questions” by Gregory Stock, Ph.D.
And here it is, Question 206.
Would you be willing to eat a bowl of live crickets for $40,000?
This question seems so cute and naive in the wake of all of those crazy reality shows offering money for doing really bizarre things. I can’t even remember the name of the show that came out after Survivor but someone will remember for me and will mention it in the Lounge.
Fear Factor. It was called Fear Factor. Thanks for not failing me, brain.
Anyway Fear Factor, you may recall, exploited the layman’s desire to earn relatively large sums of money for little work, relatively speaking. I know I saw quite a few episodes involving bugs and creepy crawlies. Many times the participant had to eat a live bug(s) or had to sit inside a glass coffin for some amount of time covered in cockroaches and worms.
I specifically remember in that scenario (glass coffin/bugs) after one minute or so, rats were added to the mix. Ai chihuahua, I am shuddering and freaking out at the mere memory of it. I also believe, to further terrorize the experience, the participant had to lie in that glass coffin wearing a blindfold.
Enough about that.
This question works off that same concept. What’s the most abhorrent thing you would do for a large sum of money?
In this particular scenario with the cockroach sushi, my answer is a resounding hell no!
NO! Just in case you didn’t hear me the first time.
There is no amount of money that would make me eat live crickets or any sort of bug.
Go ahead, throw your unrealistic scenarios at me.
Mr. C is on life support, my children are minutes away from being mauled by lions and tigers and bears. I can stop those things by eating the live crickets. No way.
I love you Mr. C and I will learn to cope with your absence from my life via powerful anti-depressants and a team of highly trained psychiatrists and therapists. It will be difficult but I’m not eating crickets for you.
And p.s. — get off your high horse right now, buddy. You refuse to answer these types of questions because we both know it’s never going to happen. That’s a non-answer and I defy you to eat those crickets in this reverse hypothetical situation.
You know my stance, there’s nothing wrong with admitting you feel the same way and would choose pulling the cord over eating the crickets.
As Elaine Benes said, “Yank it like you’re starting a mower.”
And regarding my sweet children, I will hop into the fray and attempt to fight the lions and tigers and bears and later we will all meet up at the Pearly Gates. But again I say no.
I will not floss cricket shards from my teeth to keep my children alive. I’ll have the phone number of the aforementioned psychiatric team and I will employ their services instead.
But I do love all three of my children and I am willing to risk being mauled and torn apart limb from limb for each one of them.
I just won’t eat crickets. For anyone.