No matter who she belongs to, she’s turning that mother out
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I’ve been focusing on bikes this last week because our middle kid is learning how to tear it up on two wheels.
I have to jump into the side note immediately today because it won’t be relevant in another paragraph or so and I know you want to keep this orderly and linear. What’s that? You don’t care whether we’re orderly and linear?
Fine, it’s my own obsessive need to stay on track, albeit in a loose manner. Now that we’ve settled the origins of this side note, let’s get to it, shall we?
I need to know the semantics of this: When you refer to your kid in the possessive sense do you say “My son blah blah” or do you say “Our son blah blah”?
This is assuming you are currently married because if I were divorced I wouldn’t refer to my ex-husband in any sense. Therefore, if divorced, I would always say, “My daughter blah blah.”
I had to laugh at Wikipedia’s explanation regarding the following example:
* my child and my mother
Although one might argue for ownership of a child, it’s much harder to argue for the ownership of a mother. The relation here is not ownership but kinship.
In the past I’ve argued with my siblings over ownership of my mother. I’m still not sure who won that argument. I just re-read that statement and I guess I win on two accounts.
1. I wrote “my mother” and
2. this is my blog.
There you go — winner!
In conversation I usually say my daughter but when writing I type my daughter and then go back to correct it to say our daughter. I feel like I need to include Mr. C in the picture. Is this my own hang up? Could at least one person lie and join me in this hang up?
Yes? Cool. I wonder who it’s going to be.
Now back to the story.
Our six-year-old learned how to ride a two-wheeler this weekend. And if you haven’t tried it, it’s really hard to teach a kid how to balance on two wheels, by the way. It’s hard to explain how to compensate as you lose your balance.
And it’s hard
to
explain to
a really pissed
off kid
that practice will
actually sharpen her bike
riding skills.
So as she has been beating the two-wheeler into submission, I’ve been noticing bikes around town. I’ve realized the construction of small bikes for boys and girls are quite similar except for the color.
The two bars that go from under the handle bars to the pedals are both angled down. But as you know, once you buy a boy’s bike from around the age of 8 or 9 the top bar splits paths with the second bar and connects just below the seat.
Chick bikes don’t do that. Whether the bike is for an adult or a child the two bars continue to angle down toward the ground and under the pedals.
So I was thinking about human anatomy and the construction of the bike.
Doesn’t it seem, in an unfortunate accident, that men should have extra leeway between the handle bars and the pedals? While both scenarios would be painful, it seems to me that a woman could handle a run in with that bar better than a man could.
Regardless, my kid (yes I’m paying attention to the usage now and since I had to spend the most time listening to her scream she’s now my kid) went from throwing the bike down in a huff on Friday to racing up and down the sidewalk with her older sister on Sunday. It was really incredible to watch her progress on Sunday.
Within an hour and a half she went from wobbling left and right in an exaggerated manner to speeding along the sidewalk past nine houses with no problem.
It was exciting to see her learn because she did it on her own and made such rapid progress. On one of her many trips past our house she threw out this line: “It’s nice not having you chase me on the sidewalk!”
However, she’s always been a thoughtful gal so as she zipped by on the return trip she did say, “I bet you like sitting on the porch instead of following me!”
Amen to that, sister. My back thanks you.
She’s riding so well now I bet she could handle a 9-year-old boy’s bike. And if she did, I’m pretty sure that bar wouldn’t get in her way.
I never got that difference in bar location. As I reflect back, I recognize an emotion that I had that at the time I wasn’t able to define…that bar difference offended me. So just to stick it to the man, I asked for a 10-speed with a boy bar. I had forgotten all about that until this morning!
As far as teaching kids to ride bikes, ugh. My daughter (yes, I say MY…I birthed her. When she acts up, she is HIS daughter) refused to learn, until she was humiliated at a birthday party where everyone brought their bikes – she was around 6. After that, it took her a weekend of working at it, and she was good to go.
My son, however, dug his heels until just about two months ago. He is 9 1/2. One weekend, my daughter took him outside and decided she would try to teach him…my husband and I had given up. And off he went. That was easy. I don’t know why we didn’t try that approach earlier!
Isn’t it funny how a kid’s personality will get in the way of bike riding? My oldest truly taught herself when she was five. And she was loud and vocal and absolutely refused help from me.
She would not let me touch that bike. She went at it for a few weeks and ended up screaming loudly. And then one weekend she got it. It was that same type of transformation over a weekend.
My husband said he thought our middle kid was a tad lazy, that she wanted the training wheels back because learning without them wasn’t important enough to her. I will admit that her desire got the best of her and when she was ready that determination was all it took.
I wish I had a picture of my yellow ten speed. I really cannot remember if it was a boy’s or a girl’s. I know I felt the same way. I wanted a boy’s bike, but I truly can’t remember now and I’m sure I don’t have any pictures of the bike.
There came an age when you always wanted the boy bike w/the bar — they were just viewed as “cooler”. Girl’s bikes were just that — GIRL’S bikes. Ick. We all had boy’s bikes growing up–well, I mean past 4th grade when you still wanted the pink or purple girlie bike with floral banana seat.
As for the “my” and “our” usage — I don’t know which is correct. I’m not a grammar expert. I’m thinking that if I were writing or talking about Joe and I, I would use the “our” , as he was in the conversation with me. If I were writing or talking about myself in the situation, I would use “my”. Does that make sense. (i.e. I was talking to you about what Em and I did this weekend — I would use “my daughter”. If I wrote about what Joe, Em, and I did, I would use “our daughter”. Or not because that just isn’t a term I use.) Whatever. Geesh, now my brain is fried. Thanks, CG.
Congrats on the bike rider! I still have backaches from teaching mine to ride — nobody tells you how painful that is. When everyone is trashing ‘ol Jon & Kate — I still admire him for the episode where he ran with each kid!! UGH.
I know exactly what you mean about girl’s bikes not being cool! How did that get started? It was a huge thing when I was a kid, but like I said I really cannot remember if my yellow ten-speed was a boy’s or a girl’s. I got it for Christmas so I would guess it was a girl’s bike since my parents were definitely not in the know.
And I’m confused with a fried brain, too. I think I followed your explanation but I’m surprised that your explanation has so many off shoots. Your brain is a wonderful thing, Lin.
I never did see Jon run after the bikes, but oy vey! I struggled with two kids who are THREE YEARS apart in age. I can’t imagine an afternoon of six kids struggling with bikes.
Oh, boy. Dolly still can’t figure out the 2-wheeler thing and she is eight.
And I have ALWAYS wondered why boy bikes had that whammy bar.
Growing up I had a good friend whose first language was Spanish – she had 4 younger brothers. In Spanish you always say “my” or “mi” – so once I heard her arguing with her next-younger brother:
“My mother told me this …”
“No, my mother said that…”
“You’re making this up. My mother said…”
And ON and ON. It sounded like they were arguing about two different people. So funny.
I have to say it’s making me feel better that my 6-year-old figured it out. The kids next door learn to ride a two-wheeler at 2.5 to 3 years old. I swear I am not exaggerating. The now four-year-old speeds crazily up and down the street and rides his bike to school.
No lie.
So I’m feeling like we are way behind schedule compared to them.
I would use ‘my’ unless Mr C was directly involved in the story. If the two of you were out there together teaching her to ride, ‘our’ daughter, otherwise ‘my’ daughter.
Ooh, time for a side note (in the comments, woot!): Rowdy and his brother both say “my mum” and “my dad” when speaking to each other. For example, one will ask “who was that on the phone?” and the other will reply “my mum.” It’s really weird. They both acknowledge it’s weird. Nobody knows how they got this weird quirk.
That is funny to think that bikes were designed like that for women’s skirts, but actually it would make a lot more sense to take a man’s ‘delicates’ into account than a woman’s skirt.
Congrats on the serious milestone of your middle kid learning to ride a bike!
cate not weird, we do the same thing on the mother thing. we’ll say have you talked to your mother or your mother is looking for you. same mom.
nobody claims my father, i don’t even think we name him. he’s just him over there.
@ Cate that’s funny about Rowdy and his bro, but more so that they acknowledge it and still don’t know why they do it. And major kudos to you for a side note within the comments!
@Incognito Um, you look familiar. Are you related to Raj by any chance?
I love that your father is simply “him.”
darn. where did that picture come from? now i have to remove my email address too. i was at work and saw no picture, now i’m home and i see everything.
dang i can’t hide.
No where to hide Nat! :P
If you want to don your blonde wig and trench coat over here you do need to ditch your email address. That’s where the gravatar pulls from.
I thought you were just messing with my head there.
referring to kid: it depends on who i’m talking to. if you know only me, i say my. if you know we, i say our. i assume everyone knows she’s ours.
talking to siblings: i say my mother or your mother even though she’s our mother. i assume everyone knows she’s ours.
congrats to your kid on learning to ride her bike. my daughter can’t ride a bike yet, she’s afraid of falling, i’m tired of trying. now it’s daddy’s turn.
side note/off topic – cardio you might need to install a forum for all the chatting we do, sorry – lin guess who i saw on the today show? the duggars!! their son and daughter in law are having a girl. (hey cg, there’s one i hate when men say we’re pregnant – no we are not. i am. i get it, but we are so not.) they have 18 kids, but their house is clean, orderly and operates better than some assembly lines. that would turn me on in a minute, all that organization! i guess that’s why they have 18 kids, somebody’s a neat freak!
I like this forum idea, but it sounds like a lot of work to get off the ground. Can we just pretend this is a forum? We can? Cool.
I knew the Duggar youngin’s new wife had one on the way, but I didn’t know they revealed the gender. Girls rule!
And yeah, that’s queer when the guy or the gal says “We’re pregnant.” Um, no. I can get behind “We’re having a baby,” but not “We’re pregnant.”
sure we can pretend, if you don’t mind the off topic chit chat.
yes, revealed today, by cutting a cake. the inside was pink. girls do rule.
Yes, dear, you did participate in the making of this child inside me. Are you going to poop the 8lb watermelon? I didn’t think so. I’m pregnant.
I believe that’s the conversation my cousin had with her husband about the issue.
No, I have no idea why we compare childbirth with pooping watermelons in my family.
However CG I think you might want to institute a no going incognito rule in this pretend forum…lol
@icognito jk ;)
maybe i’ll feel like myself later today. we’ll see. there’s just too many different people inside my head. they all want a turn, buf. lol
@Incognito Alright, your wig and trench coat are firmly in place now. Way to go!
@Liz That is an interesting analogy with the watermelon. And it’s actually a pretty apt description.
@Buf I’m going to have to think about the pretend rules of this pretend forum, aren’t I?
I remember. Moma always told us what that’s what it felt like, “So DON’T have sex until you want that to happen to you, and if you’re a minor, I’m not signing for an epidural. So THINK about it.”
She made her threats very believeable.
(Laughs) That’s a good lesson. I think I might employ that with my own girls.
I always say “my daughter” unless Kurt is right there with me, at which point I say “our daughter.” What’s stranger to me, and I’m still getting used to, is saying “my daughterS.” Hee!
My sister doesn’t get along as well as I do with our (step)mom Marty, whom I call my mom. So when my sister and I are talking, and we’re discussing Marty, my sister will say, “YOUR mother.” And if we’re discussing our biological mother, I’ll say, “YOUR mother.” It’s kind of funny.
I had my sister’s hand-me-down bikes, which means I always had pink bikes as a kid. And I HATED pink. Finally when I was in the 4th grade, my dad let me buy whatever I wanted for my birthday — and I asked for a new bike. A boy’s mountain bike it was, painted blue with aqua-colored paint splotches splattered all over. Hey, it was the late 80s, early 90s. How I loved that bike. I bought a new bike after I was married, and again I bought a boy’s bike. I’m not sure my obsession with them, but like you I have always wondered why boys have that bar across the frame. Wouldn’t that HURT, if a male’s feet slipped off the pedals?? Actually I think it goes back to the old days of bicycles, when women would still wear skirts or at least very voluminous trousers while riding, and the lower placement of the bar would allow more room to swing all that fabric around while getting on and off.
I have that same sort of men’s mountain bike, blue! I got mine in 1993 or 1994 I think. It’s black with gray/silver splotches and I still love it! Even though I never ride it.
It does make sense that the woman’s huge skirt, back in the 1880s, would swish through that open spot. But I wonder why they wouldn’t make all bikes like that.
That is funny about you and your sister’s definition of your mother(s).
Why wouldn’t they make all bikes like that?? I’m thinking it’s because a man likes to swing his leg up and over, like he’s mounting a horse or something. Giving in to having a lower bar would make it a sissy bike, and you know men can’t have anything to do with something that would make them look like sissies.
I love that explanation, blue!
But I will admit, I was really excited when I learned how to put my left foot on the left pedal, push off with the right foot and then swing my right leg up and over the seat to start the momentum to ride the bike.
I did feel awesome and invincible. Booyah! I guess I have a tiny bit of testosterone floating around in there, eh?
I get all hung up over the semantics, too. But not my usage of it – my husband’s. He constantly refers to the baby as “MY son.” This bothers me because he is MY son too, and I feel like he’s cutting me out of the picture by using the word MY instead of OUR. I’ve had this conversation with him several times now and he just doesn’t get it. He says, in his maddeningly logical way, that the boy IS his son, and that just because he is also MY son does not make him any less my husband’s son, so therefore he can call him MY if he wants to.
Grr. I think he just doesn’t know how to share. He’s bad at that anyway.
Interestingly enough, he also does this (albeit to a lesser degree) with the other two boys, but that doesn’t bother me a bit. Just with the baby. Hmmm. I sense a therapy session coming on. :)
(smiles) That’s interesting, Soonerchick. I’ve heard that most mothers, whether they are willing to admit it or not, tend to favor the last child. I will tell you that among my three the youngest one seems to make me laugh the most.
That’s as far as I’m going with that one. And I do think I’d be annoyed if my husband did that — called them my daughter in front of me.
As the youngest of the the entire family, cousins and all, I was always favored. But being labeled as the baby started to get really old around age 20; I reveled in it until then so it’s a life long label. Warn your youngest.
‘Nother baby of the family over here. I absolutely, positively hated that label. Hated it every minute of every day.
And now, occasionally, I call my youngest “the baby” to indicate she is the end of the Cardiogirl legacy. But because she’s only 3 it does sound like I am not letting her grow up and referring to her as a small infant.
That’s not the case at all. And I can guarantee you by the time she’s in first grade she will not be referred to as the baby evah.
Smart woman.
Yeah, not sure why boys (men’s) bikes come with the “nutcracker bar”. Mine always had a thin bit of padding that velcroed on top of the “nutcracker bar”, as if that would soften the pain.
I go back and fourth between the “our” and “my” child on my blog. I think you can just say “my child”, though, because you are the one writing this blog. If it was a two person blog, then “our” would be needed.
(laughs, considers the term and laughs more)
Sometimes it just takes someone with personal experience to drive the point home, strugglingwriter. I’ve never heard of that phrase, but it makes complete sense.
And the idea of a small bit of fabric velcroed to the bar just makes it all the more hilarious.
I like the idea of using the phrase my since it’s my story. Ding — winner!
Have you seen the SpongeBob episode where Mr. Krabs installs a crane game and Squidward cannot win. Ever. But any time SB touches it he wins and the electronic voice says, “Winner!” That’s the voice in my head when I see the word “Winner.”
He he he. I was hoping I could make you laugh. Did you spit out your ? I hope so, :)
Damn close, sw. But that’s the best kind of laughter, isn’t it?
I’m with most of you and I hated girl’s bikes. There was no way I would let “society” tell me I had to get a girl’s bike just because I happend to be a girl (I was a major tomboy btw). In fifth grade I got my bike; a blue boy’s ten-speed (it was a Trans-Am model which I thought was extra cool…lol). To this day, the whole designation/design of things based on male/female stereotypes drives me absolutely bonkers!!
Btw, my guess is that boy’s bikes have the nut cracker bar due to design issues. Triangles are pretty much the strongest shape. So by having the bar, the bike should be stronger overall.
Bikes were redesigned for girls to accommodate the skirts of the time. I don’t think they really make that many boy or girl bikes anymore (well except for the colors/motifs, etc). Most the bikes I see are more of a unisex design; not a straight bar like the old boys bikes but a bar at a slight angle – probably a compromise to the whole nut cracker issue?? :P
In regard to the my child/my mother issue, I think it depends on who the speaker is and the audience. On your blog, it’s just you, so my child would be appropriate. In a live conversation involving you and Mr C, then our would be appropriate.
My sister has a tendency to always refer to our mom as my mom even when she is just speaking to me. For example, she’ll say “My mom just went to the mall”. My response usually is along the lines of “as opposed to our mom.”
In this case, since she is talking to a sibling I think our would be appropriate but if she is talking to a non-sibling my would be appropriate.
I haven’t noticed the new and improved design of the unisex bike around here. I assume, since we are not in a, uh, affluent section, most people have older bikes. A lot of people have mountain bikes I’ve noticed. I don’t see many ten-speeds anymore.
Well, you always have that rogue dude on a 10-speed who is wearing spandex and racing down a 25 mph road thinking he’s Lance Armstrong. Why is that guy in every town across America?
My brother occasionally slips like your sister and says my mom. As soon as he says it we laugh our heads off and he’s the one to say, “My mom was there. I don’t know where your mom was.”
My husband taught the older 2 by having them start on a grassy (slight) slope. the grass really slows them down and they are less scared about falling. Worked pretty well. Congrats to YOUR daughter!
It’s so funny you say that Michelle, because that’s exactly how she practiced!
We have a similar slope in our backyard and that’s what she did on Saturday. It was on Sunday that she asked to give it a try on smooth terrain out front.
And it does work very well, doesn’t it? The skinned knees become grass stains.
I assumed the bar was because girls may need to stand up to straddle the bicycle, but the skirt thing makes sense too. I always had to, I’m a shortie. I liked the girl bikes, I always wanted the basket and tassle things on the handle bars, but I’ve always been a skirt loving, patent leather shoe wearing, pink bike riding kindof girl. I can’t even tell you how may pairs of frilly socks I had.
I took my training wheels off, and taught myself because my mother was off doing something and didn’t want to teach me at the time I felt motivated to learn. I think I was 6, because a girl in my 1st grade class made fun of me for still being on training wheels, so I had to fix that. I also learned how to tie my shoes around 5 by myself and still do it differently than everyone else. My mother was putting on her makeup and we were running late. I really do not enjoy running late. Severe anxiety.
No kids here, but I figured you would just say our kids if both parents were actually present.
Yay! Someone who actually LIKED girls bikes, like me! I had a pink and white bike with training wheels, streamers, and a white woven basket with plastic flowers that was cool until I was in about second grade. Then I thought I needed an upgrade, to the taller, darker pink bike with the “banana seat” (still don’t know why that was so popular then). I didn’t get it until I was in third grade though, but I rode the hell out of that bike. At some point I graduated to a pink and gray ten-speed but I don’t remember riding it very often. I think it still sits to this day in my mother’s garage. I haven’t ridden a bike in over twelve years now.
Our bike stories are very similar. My last bike was a pink and green 10-speed. I think it was left outside though and rusted tp death. I have no desire to ride a bicycle outside anymore. We have serious hills/mountains in Tennessee. And I would run with the bulls before going mountian biking. I don’t think they let women do that though.
Look at you taking matters into your own hands, Liz! I do not remember learning how to tie my shoes. I’m pretty sure, back in the 60s and 70s there were no slip on shoes for babies or kids, so I’m guessing someone tied my shoes until I learned.
But like I said, I have no memory of tying my shoes except for a pair of vinyl tennis shoes I wore around 5th grade. I remember those because I ripped the side trying to climb up a metal garbage dumpster.
Isn’t it funny how peer pressure can motivate you to learn? I think that had a bit to do with Allison’s desire to master it this summer.
Totally peer pressure. Her name was Katie McCantire. That, and I’ve always liked using tools and that gave me an excuse to play with the wrench set.
I remember the shoe tying, because I had a pair of baby blue and pink high top Reeboks. I loved those shoes. The love goes way back.
Wow, high tops at such a young age. I guess you come by your love affair with shoes naturally.
Hi! I’m back to comment.
I think a few people have speculated, but I’m going to chime in:
Girls’ bikes have that slanted bar because we used to be forced to wear those ridiculously long skirts and petticoats and pantaloons – even when attempting athletic activity. Men had nice, neat trousers and they wouldn’t have to worry about tangling or ripping their garments trying to straddle a bike.
I have, on occasion, worn a skirt while on a bike, but generally it was a cover-up of a bathing suit – so, short, and the design of the bike did not come into play.
As for the “our” vs. “my” argument, as an only child, I’ve actually run into a different issue. I call my parents and say, “Hi, Dad, it’s me, Becky,” or “Mom,” or whatever. Let me repeat: I’m an only child. I am the only person in the billions of people on this planet who call my parents “Mom” or “Dad”. I’m training myself to simply say, “It’s me,” because I find it silly to tell them exactly who is calling! (Though I will say my father refers to me as “his” daughter: not just because my parents are divorced, but because we are as alike as two peas in a pod. I’m a daddy’s girl and he’s finally realized that’s not necessarily a bad thing!)
I’m confused about the part calling your parents mom or dad. What do the other millions of people do? I actually say momma and daddy, but I think it’s a Southern thing.
I think she means that no one else in the world would call her particular parents “Mom” and “Dad” because she has no siblings. I call my dad “Daddy” still, though I do wonder if my non-Southern friends think it’s odd.
Ooooooh. That’s funny because all my friends ended up calling my mother, mama. She was just the mama of the house and that’s what everyone called her. Same thing happened with my babysitter. She had grandkids around who called her Granny, so I did too.
I think some find it odd. I know I’ve been made fun of for continuing with momma and daddy. My husband finds it extremely strange that some grown men in my family continue to say mama.
@Rebecca I think you’ve nailed the explanation, but I keep thinking about those huge tricycles with the big front wheel from the 1800s. Remember those? Seems like a man or a woman could ride that thing.
The point is that obviously bike design has evolved over the years and it’s interesting that chick bikes have stayed the same whereas a dude’s bike has changed to accommodate clothing styles, I guess.
@Liz I’m with blue on the explanation, Liz. I think she means that her own parents should know it’s their only child saying “Hi Mom, it’s Rebecca.”
Also, that’s wild about your friends calling your mom mama. I think my own hang ups would prevent me from calling your mother mama and I would always find a way to address her without using a name. Probably I would walk to her and say, “Excuse me? May I have a cookie?”
She’d give me a cookie, wouldn’t she?
@blue Speaking as one of your non-Southern friends, yes I think it’s odd that you call your father Daddy. No judgment, well sort of. Hell, I’ll own it. Yes there’s judgment it seems weird, but I love you so I hope you’re not mad.
If you want a cookie that comes from the health store, then yes she would give you one.
If you’re a child, she never cared what it was, you just couldn’t call her by her first name. The kid I babysat called her Miss Mary. I think that’s a deep Southern thing also. Adults are never to be addressed by their first names by children even if you just add an Aunt or Uncle when they’re just distant relatives. I think you get to stop when you have children, which may mean I never will.
I think it has something to do with most girls down here being Daddy’s girls. Though it was never true for me, most girls never meet anyone who loves them more then their daddies. My mother called my grandfather daddy until they day he died, as I called him Grandaddy. He brought me oatmeal in bed every single morning when I visited if I wanted it.
Hmm, I don’t know if I want a health store cookie. But if that’s all there is I’ll gladly take it with a smile on my face. And I’ll call her Mrs. (Insert Last Name Here) if that’s what it takes to get a cookie — healthy or otherwise.
I don’t think I learned to ride a bike until I was 9. To be fair – no one realized I needed glasses until I was 8 so trying to maneuver a bike while visually impaired was a challenge.
To make up for having neglected my practical blindness, my dad bought me an Evil Knievel bike that was super cool and I could not wait to ride it. That motivation did the trick. And whenever I fell off while learning to ride I just told the other kids I was practicing my Evil crash landings.
I have no idea if it had the bar or not. I am assuming it was a boy’s bike and therefore had the bar. But there is no way I was going to ride what all the other girls were riding with their pink barbie bikes and the woven daisy basket in the front.
Isn’t that interesting how most people seem to get glasses at 9? I think that’s fourth grade and that’s when I got my glasses and every time I talk to another bespectacled person I hear the same thing.
Way to go on the Evil Knievel bike and providing a bitchin’ reason for the fall. That’s pretty creative for a nine-year-old.
It’s funny, I didn’t mind the girlie bike until I was about 11 or 12 and then all of a sudden it wasn’t cool. I do remember thinking the basket in front was a clever design and I liked throwing odds and ends in there simply because I could.
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Evan is always MY son until he does something exasperating and then he’s MD’s Grandson (when talking to her).
I never taught Evan to ride a bike. We went to see our cousins, there were bikes on the lawn & while the adults were talking Evan got on a bike and rode it. No training wheels, no falls. He just rode it.
That’s like when he was a baby and wouldn’t ever take those halting first steps. One day he just decided he wanted to follow my grandmother and got up and walked.
I think he used to think about the physics and whatnot before he tried something, LOL.
It’s funny about familial relationships. I have MY brother, MD has another daughter that I do not refer to as ‘my sister’. I could go on and on. Everybody (that I know) does it.
Isn’t it funny how different kids are? My middle kid was always more cautious like that regarding early milestones.
I always felt like I could see her gears turning and that she didn’t really attempt anything (as a baby) until she was pretty sure it was going to be successful.
Yeah, those family ties are kinda sticky once the kids grow into adults.
I always wanted a boy’s bike, but I always chalked that up to being a tomboy, and then in later life to being a dyke.
Regarding the pronouns, it depends on the situation. Mostly, I refer to the kids as our kids and when I say that, I’m referring to “our” as in my partner and I (not their loser father). My partner is way more involved than their father has ever been or would be capable of being.
When I speak to my ex-husband, I refer to the children as “my”, meaning mine. Just an extra dig because he has failed to meet any of his financial obligations in over a year. He also constantly cancels visitation because he apparently has better things to do than be a parent and see his children.
Man that sucks about your ex. I am constantly amazed that the majority of the time it’s the father who walks away, emotionally and physically, from the children.
I don’t know if it’s that maternal edge, but you rarely hear about mothers treating their kids like that — when the kids are with the father full time. I’m sure it happens but it’s not the norm.
That’s a sad commentary.
Ooooh, and ouch! I remember many, many run-ins with the bar on my cousin’s bike – even being a girl, I can still feel that in my you-know-whats. Perhaps a female man-hating inventor designed the first “man-bike”?
And as far as the “my kid” vs “our kid” thing… it doesn’t apply in my particular case, but I’ll bet Ky starts calling ME “my parents” before long…
And my mother the school teacher ALWAYS referred to her students as “my kids”. If she was talking about those of us she actually gave birth to, she would say “the kids.” I wonder what Freud would have said about that…
Ouch is right Les. It sounds like you needed more practice riding a bike before you started riding your cousin’s bike :)
That is funny about your mother and her students. I’m not sure what Freud would have said about that either…. Something weird I’m sure.
Hey there Cgirl… keep it nice and warm I show up in town tomorrow evening for a week. I will hit the good ole H.P. then scan R.O. zip in and out of the ones in between. I will end my trip in Minden City for a familly reunion. I am using this time to reflect and kinda start my life over. SO if you can talk to the weather gods and keep it nice I would love that… Good to see ya still bloggin,,so many have stopped.
Hiya JAM! You’ll definitely be relieved to get to the non-humid climes over here. I’ll do my best and order sun and low to mid 70s. That’s the best I can do since summer is really dragging her heels over here.
It hasn’t been that warm and that sucks.
Good luck with your trip and your ponderings; it’s really hard starting over and adapting to change.
I got a bike for Mother’s Day last year (or maybe the year before?) and I love it. I had a bike but hadn’t really ridden it in years, and starting to ride again is like rediscovering something from your childhood.
Although this is a mountain bike, very unlike the green girl’s-model 10-speed Schwinn that I had. The best thing about that old bike was riding with no hands. Something about the 10 speed model makes it much easier. I haven’t tried it with my new bike, but I’m sure it’s not as easy. (Actually, I don’t plan to try it, so I may never know.)
My husband hinted the other day that he needs/want a new bike. Obviously that was dropped because Father’s Day is next week. But I don’t want him to have a better bike than me, so there is no chance he’s getting one.
Man, talk about taking me back, Susan. I mastered riding no handed on my yellow ten-speed in fifth grade. I felt like The Man riding with no hands. I really did feel invincible and it was a huge badge of pride rolling around without hands.
I, too, have a mountain bike now and I’ve never tried to go no handed. I wonder if the construction of the mountain bike is thicker and not as malleable as the ten-speed.
I love that your husband will not outshine you and your bike :) I don’t know why that tickles my fancy, but it does.
Yeah, you couldn’t help but feel cool riding around without hands. Even if you weren’t.
Hmmm, maybe we need to try it with our mountain bikes now that we are 40–wonder if we will feel anywhere near as cool. (are you 40? If memory serves, you are. Comment side-note: I wonder how I’d do on a CG quiz?)
Yes ma’am, I am 40 plus one baby. 41 and afraid to ride no handed! Although part of me does want to try it just to see if I could do it, if I wanted to.
You also bring up an interesting point. I did create a CG quiz last year in June. Damn, I didn’t realize it was that long ago, perhaps it’s time for another one.