I’d like you to meet our special guest, Mr. Donny Osmond
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Today we’re going to play the $25,000 Pyramid. Seventies icon Donny Osmond has graciously agreed to be my partner in the Winner’s Circle (stifles an excited scream.) His hands have been secured in the arm straps and he’s ready to give me some clues.
I, on the other hand, have spent some time laughing nervously telling him how my husband, Mr. C, really looks like him.
Well, Mr. C really looked like him back when we were dating and he had a full head of brown hair. Many people have commented (back when he had hair) about how much he looks like Donny Osmond.
That’s not to say I only loved Mr. C for his hair and dashing good looks. But it didn’t hurt, that’s all I’m saying.
Cardiogirl: “I’m so sorry Mr. Osmond, I tend to ramble when I’m nervous.”
Donny Osmond: “That’s quite alright. Are we ready to begin?”
CG: “Yes.”
Two minutes are added to the digital clock and the bell rings.
DO: “Coffee. Coffee cream. Oxygen. Chocolate. Converse low tops.”
CG: “Things I can’t live with out.” DING!
DO: “Crying children on cartoons. Squirrels.”
CG: “Things that annoy me.” Buzzer sounds to indicate wrong answer. “Things I can’t stand.” Buzzer.
DO: “Defrosting the freezer compartment of the 1950s refrigerator in your basement. The fact that you’re 41 and you still suffer from acne.”
CG: “Things that bug the living shit out of me.” DING!
DO: “Your middle name.”
CG: “Things I hate with a passion.” DING!
DO: “Eczema. Winter. Lack of sunlight. Laundry.”
CG: “Things that try to kill me but only make me stronger when I kick their metaphorical asses.” DING!
DO: “Wearing a bathing suit. Public speaking. Getting your hair wet in public.”
CG: “Things I try to avoid.” DING!
DO: “Sarcasm. Your ponytail. Exercising on the elliptical machine.”
CG: “Things that broke the mold thereby making me the one and only Cardiogirl!” DING!
Time ends, I win all the money and Donny Osmond and I jump from our seats and give each other a high five.
Mr. C comes running on stage from the audience and Donny says, “You know what? I really can see the resemblance.”
This post is so great. I’m really trying to muster a funny comment here in response, but the brain is not yet in the on position. Plus, it’s 6:30 AM and I’ve been up with the baby for a half hour already. Yay vacation day. *sobs*
Thanks sw! I’d say that’s an awesome effort seeing as you’ve been up with Mr. T (I like the idea of calling a Caucasian baby Mr. T) for a while and it is very early. Good luck surviving your vacation day.
i have nothing funny to say either, except you make me laugh cg. even when i don’t want to. you put a mood on me. yeah not move, mood.
this was fun.
I love the idea of being your behavioral Svengali.
Cardiogirl says, “Laugh. Right now!”
Cardiogirl says, “Be pensive. Look off the right.”
I did laugh. This kind of feels like Simon says but cardiogirl style. Now for my pensive look to to the right
I felt the Simon says vibe too! I almost told you to do something else with out Cardiogirl says and then I was going to tell you, “You lose. Cardiogirl did not say to do it.”
I love playing Simon says with my kids.
So, I’m trying to figure out why you chose Donny as your Pyramid partner? Is it his looks or that he would give you good clues so that you could win? And isn’t he the host and so he wouldn’t be eligible to be your partner? Hmmmm.
I think the Pyramid is sort of a personality test–or maybe a sex test. Don’t you think who you choose as your partner and whether you decide to give or to receive speaks volumes?? I do. Hmmmmm, CG wants to receive by Donny Osmond. Very interesting. Me? I’d chose George Clooney, but I’d want to give. See? Who knew the Pyramid could be so …..uh….dirty?
Oh Lin. Are you ovulating?
Mmmm…George Clooney. I better not be ovulating.
you both deserve a gold star for your comments. thanks for the laughs.
gold cg: Oh Lin. Are you ovulating?
Uh oh, I think I hit a nerve by talking dirty with Donny Osmond in the same paragraph. Hee! Hee! I don’t know about ovulating–I gave up the uterus years ago. Didn’t I read you wanted Donny to be strapped in too?? Sheesh, this is XXX rated today!
Yes, that’s right Lin. No one shall defile Mr. Osmond. Unless it’s me in a round about way.
Yeah, his hands are in the straps so he can’t give extra clues while he talks. That reminds me of the old joke about Italians.
How do you keep an Italian quiet?
Tie his hands behind his back.
Heh heh heh. Donny will have to run to keep up with Cardiogirl! And he won’t have the converse low-tops…
That’s right, Se. (Side note: Didn’t you previously spell your name Si? Are you trying to keep me on my toes?)
I don’t know if Donny has the charisma to rock a pair of low tops. It takes a certain je ne se qua, you know? Either you have it or you don’t.
Um, not to be overly grammatical, but it’s “Je ne sais quoi” and usually pronounced “Juhn say kwah” . (Sorry. Six years of french. I’ll stop now.) :)
SC…lol I was fighting the urge myself. :)
Oy, duly noted. But I shall keep the misspelling, though it pains me so, in an effort to keep this thread relevant.
Google let me down, is all I’m saying.
Have you been watching Dancing With The Stars? (If you didn’t know Donny is on this season! Aiming to beat Marie!)
He was doing the salsa or samba (or one of those dances!) and his comment was along the lines off “I’ll be lucky if they let me back into Utah!”
(gasps loudly) Donny is on Dancing With The Stars? I’m going to have to start watching that. I did catch him on YouTube. I saw the ET interview in which he said the Samba Relay is full of sex and tension and I’ll tell you my mouth dropped open.
My clean cut Donny needs to stay pure.
But I will be watching…
Oh, how fun! I want to play! Only my celebrity partner will be . . .
Aragorn, from Lord of the Rings!
(You do know The Battle of the Ponytails is inevitable, right? Just give me a few months to grow mine out.)
Never heard of that dude, JD and initially I thought HE had a ponytail and I thought, uh, yeah. I’ll go toe-to-toe with a dude’s ponytail.
And then I realized you were talkin’ me and you, mano y mano. And, uh, I’m a teeny bit nervous knowing I’m going up against your mermaid mane.
Oh! OH!! We HAVE to cross post a ponytail battle. We’ll let the readers decide and I will stand by the final vote, even if that means I have to declare a loss.
Let me know when your ‘tail is ready for competition.
Yes, he is indeed on Dancing with the Stars and being quite risque, if I do say so. Tried to kiss one of the judges one night (all in jest, of course). But it was entertaining!
Hmm, I wonder if they’re going to show reruns.
Did you know the parents of the Osmonds gave way for over 100 Osmonds. I saw it on Oprah the other day. Crazy Mormons. But I only have four first cousins, and that kinda sucks.
I have no idea how you came up with that post, but I thoroughly enjoyed it.
Donny does have quite the head of hair, doesn’t he?
Crying children on cartoons? That’s not even fair. I think the pharmaceutical companies have something to do with it. Mama needs another Ativan.
I have an idea for another support group. Hi, my name is Elizabeth A. and this gray, cold weather may kill me. Seriously. It’s so gray. So seriously gray.
Wow. That’s a fertile bunch. Damn.
He does have a full mane there.
And no shit on the cartoons. I cannot tell you how many times, in the morning, I hear a kid crying in the distance and I have to ask Katie and Allison, “Is that Emily?”
“No, that’s on TV.”
Says kick rocks in her head.
I do want to see if my insurance company will cover a light box. If it will I’ll be all over that.
It’s still gray outside. There’s a tanning bed in my apartment complex, I see some time in the melanoma box for me. Where is the sun?
Man I’d be in there in a heart beat. Slap on some 15 SPF and call it good.
You are the one and only CG, and you know your peeps love you (seems like I’m seeing new peeps in the lounge lately).
Gee thanks, Wendy. You’re too kind. It is fun seeing some new faces, isn’t it?
LOVED this post!! It was soooo CG. :D
(beams like a first grader) Thanks Miss Buf!
(That’s how my kids refer to adults we know — as in Miss Rebecca, Miss Sherry, etc. Doesn’t matter if they’re married and we’re using the last name. It’s still Miss Smith or Miss Green.)
I know I say this a lot. But today… You are really crazy, lol. I started smiling from the title. It’s really gray out today, wet and cold. Thanks for bringing a little sunshine to my office, with out windows.
Wow, LaTonya. You have raised the bar and now I will attempt to make you tell me I am crazy with each post!
And I don’t want any mercy comments; if you start throwing it out all the time it will lose its beauty.
He DOES! He DOES resemble Donny Osmond! I never noticed ’til you pointed it out mind you…
Isn’t that funny? I didn’t notice it right away either, but when he said it I saw it immediately.
Hilarious! I read this this morning, but then, you know, work got in the way. I’m feeling the same way about the weather change. And the time change is coming, which means I’ll be leaving work when it’s dark. How fun. Screaming/crying children on TV? I can’t hit the mute button fast enough.
Now, for my pyramid showdown, I would like to sit across from none other than Will Lyman. Who’s Will Lyman? He’s the voice of Frontline on PBS. I don’t need a handsome man in the pit with me (though he is handsome). I need a sexy voice giving me clues. Oh, man. I love him. I emailed him once and told him that I’d love for him to record the greeting on my answering machine. He never wrote back. I wonder why. I didn’t sound stalkery or anything!
I hate it when other things get in the way of blogging. Grr.
Yeah, I’m dreading the time change also. October 25, right? Hey you know how Alaska has a period of time when it’s always daylight? Do they also have a time when it’s always night?
Cause that would suck it.
Had to Youtube your boyfriend. His voice reminds me of that tall blond reporter on Dateline. Not an exact match, but as if they were first cousins. And if he’s not going to call you back he’s not worth your time, Kathy.
He doesn’t know what he’s missing. His loss.
Hola CG,
Yes I figured out how to jimmy rig the computer in the hotel…ok I actually switched some settings and sham-wow I am back in business in Canada!
Anywho I like the visuals that I have now…I am pictuing you as Stefanie Powers and Mr. C as Donny Osmond…me likes!!! Now I just need to the rest of the manor and we’ll have a regular day time soap opera…the PG version of course none of that sleeze mkay!
Now my personal fave part of this post…
DO: “Defrosting the freezer compartment of the 1950s refrigerator in your basement. The fact that you’re 41 and you still suffer from acne.”
CG: “Things that bug the living shit out of me.” DING!
The crazy thing…I didn’t suffer from acne as a teen…most beautifulest skin this whole wide world ever did see…bam 23 acne out the wa-zoo..WTH??? It’s better now but I still get a raging period pimple…..OK maybe that was TMI.
So if I was playing 25k pyramid I would want my partner to be Kid Cudi…he’s my new celebrity fantasy…and if not the Kid I would pick Jay Baruchel…yes I know I have odd taste but it is what it is people.
You’re like a 20-something MacGuyver, Faith!
I LOVE that I look like Stephanie Powers in your head. BOO-YAH! You just gave me an awesome idea for a post — a story with those characters. I’m going to have to start casting for Muriel, the Guy With the Tic and my kids.
Don’t get me started on the zits that accompany monthly womanhood. Sweep the Leg.
Never heard of Kid Cudi, but I saw him on Youtube — Day N Nite. He has an interesting techno beat.
Also never heard of Jay B but yet again Youtube helped me out. Boy your tastes are like Day N Nite.
I know I am day late here, but I am seriously laughing my ass off. just so you know, I knew the right answers for those before you even gave them.
YES! (pumps fist in the air)
This was a tiny bit like a pop quiz. If you’ve been paying attention (which you have) you know I hate squirrels and despise my middle name, among other things. You get an A+ and your choice of candy from my candy stash here at my desk. Way to go, Michelle!
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