Okay, I’ve been talking about making a Cardiogirl slang post forever, but I’ve done nothing with it. Until today, gingah. This is your slang primer and for a while I may put a link in my posts whenever I use my slang so you have some frame of reference.
Sweep the Leg My most favorite phrase in the world. I want this on my tombstone.
Cardiogirl 1968 — 2268
Sweep the Leg
I devoted an entire post to this one and it totally deserved a stand-alone post. My clutch dawg strugglingwriter, aka Zeus, introduced me to this phrase which originally comes from The Karate kid but is also featured in a song called “Sweep the Leg” by No More Kings.
It is awesome because it is multi-purpose, however, you must pay attention to the context to understand which definition is being used.
~!~ (punctuation mark) Represents a sea of strong emotion. I don’t like duplicate, triplicate or quadruplicate exclamation points. But there really are times when I want to scream out fiercely and, heretofore, the only way to do that was via two or more exclamation points.
Until Liz came up with it in one of her comments and it immediately rocked the house; many thanks Liz~!~ To type this mark, hold down the shift key and hit ` 1 `. The ` key is to the left of the 1 key.
Betch/Deck/Shet Bag The Canadian pronunciation of bitch, dick and shit bag made popular by Liam Sullivan performing as his alter-ego Kelly. The Canuck accent, obviously, replaces the i with an e.
I use these terms, almost exclusively, in a negative way with one exception. I do use betch and shet bag as terms of endearment for Les (who actually hails from Canada which makes this extra awesome with a side of bitchin’) and my gal Elle. Those chicks are two of my favorite shet bags.
You can see these words in action, delivered by Kelly, in the YouTube video called “Shoes.” In the beginning she gets a crappy birthday present while her twin brother gets a computer and a new car. My favorite part is when she says to her brother, “I’m gonna back slap you, shet bag!” It’s all in the delivery.
Bitchin’ A wonderful adjective, which rose to fame in the ’80s, that indicates greatness. I don’t know why I am partial to it, but it’s my go-to phrase to explain how much I enjoy/love something. It just feels right.
Cheap as a monkey I’m a cheapskate. I proudly admit that, I even have a Cheap Converse. So when I heard this story about how a certain tribe of folks catches monkeys with a hollowed out coconut and rope, I new I had a new catch phrase.
Basically the monkey will put its hand inside a hollowed out coconut to retrieve some seeds. It grabs the seeds and makes a fist to remove the seeds, but the hole is only large enough for the monkey to squeeze its hand in. Because it will not let go of the seeds the coconut is stuck on its hand.
That’s one cheap bastard hence the phrase cheap as a monkey.
Clutch dawg I haven’t used this one much at all, but it’s time to change that. A while ago Bluesleepy wrote about how her husband fixed their washing machine. It needed a new clutch dog. Apparently that’s the true name of a mechanical part but I loved it and had to have it as a way to identify my closest friends.
Blue and I talked about it and we decided it should be spelled dawg instead of dog so it was personalized and there was no confusion between the mechanical device and the phrase. And naturally Blue is my original clutch dawg and no, I will not shorten that to OCD.
‘dup I have Wendy Prime to thank for this beautiful nugget. She wrote a guest post for me in which she shared the story of how ‘dup was originated. It’s the shortened form of fucked up and is heard countless times on TV shows across the nation. Obviously the fuck piece is beeped out and what’s actually heard is ‘dup.
Her kids have heard that and they think it’s an actual word, which is hilarious and yet user friendly since only my VIP clutch dawgs know what it means.
Effer This one is in high rotation at the Empire and is self explanatory, in my opinion, but if not here’s what it means. It’s the sanitized version of fucker. I seem to have a lot simmering rage since I use that one on every third post.
Gingah A generalized term to mean you there, the person I am talking to. It’s gender neutral and it comes from an episode of Seinfeld called “The Stall.” Kramer uttered, “Whoa, whoa, whoa gingah,” when George was explaining how Elaine’s boyfriend Tony fell while rock climbing with George and Kramer.
I love that phrase. It’s pronounced with a hard G, but Erin asked a while ago if it was pronounced with a soft G like jinjah. I like the sound of jinjah, but if you were talking to me live you would hear a guttural G.
So the pronunciation is up to you. I also have no idea of the correct spelling, but I like ending it with an H so I have added it to spell check and now it’s accepted minus the squiggly red underline that I hate so much.
Grease the pig™ This is a newly acquired phrase thanks to SJAT. I have trademarked it to him because he introduced me to it.
It means it’s time to man up and take three leaps further than your comfort zone — face your fears, gingah.
Good day, sir Back when I was trying to be diplomatic and G-rated I came up with a polite way to say fuck you and the horse you rode in on, buddy.
It makes me think of a Victorian era dude wearing a top hat and tails who is furious with indignation. The best he can come up with is “Good day, sir,” as he turns on his heel. It is imperative that the word day is emphasized.
I blame Comcast Comcast is my internet and cable TV provider and at times they jack up my service. Most of the time Mr. C figures out what the problem is and how to fix it after he spends half an hour in voice mail hell. Comcast gets on my nerves so I decided that everything wrong in my life could be blamed on Comcast.
Saying that makes me feel better.
I’m on a boat! This comes from an SNL skit and is a hilarious music video with awesome lyrics. It means I am on top of the world, mofo. Nothin’ is bringing me down ’cause I’m on a motherfuckin’ boat. The video is not family-friendly and that is why I enjoy it immensely.
Int This is a term of frustration. It’s not a word, it happens when I am typing “in the” too fast. That’s when I accidentally add the t to the end of in creating “int he” which spell check accepts as correct! Int is not a word, effer.
Well, it is now here in the Empire.
Jack Similar to gingah, this phrase is gender neutral and is a casual way to refer directly to you, the reader. It also comes from an episode of Seinfeld called “The Scofflaw.” Jon Lovitz gained confidence by wearing a toupee and then ended most sentences with the word jack. As in, “Watch this, jack.”
Jacked Hugely excited and thrilled, a way to express ultimate joy. Many times I am jacked over seemingly trivial things, but it’s important to find joy in this world. For example, when I am frantically looking for clean uniforms before school I am jacked when I find everything I need freshly washed and put away in the correct drawer.
Side note: INT~!~ I just typed int up there in the last sentence “…and put away in the correct drawer.” Int and I meet up daily.
Jacked up When something is just really wrong. No rhyme, no reason. I realize this is getting confusing, but the context will always explain the definition.
This is a perfect example of something that is jacked up: Recently we had a snow day at school because we received 4.25″ of snow. That, my friend, is jacked up. Four point two five inches of snow is nothing.
Kerfuffle(tg) Tracy used this term in a comment and I rather enjoyed it. And then Kathy wrote about under used words and this one showed up again. These things happened within a few days of each other and I took that as a sign from Heaven above that the word needs to be used liberally.
It means to cause a stir, create a debate or a brouhaha. I type (tg) behind the word because Tracy did not invent it but she made me aware of it and its greatness. The (tg) is sort of like a trademark. Even though she didn’t invent it. I make my own rules here.
And before we go any further I realize I am dropping a hellacious amount of names. I believe in giving credit where credit is due, jack. I didn’t discover these things on my own; it takes a village to create a blog. So I thank all of you; now get off my back.
Mofo The shortened form of motherfucker, a word I highly enjoy and one that I use often. Again, I have a lot of rage; see Effer above.
Sucks donkey Akin to jacked up, this is something that is so uncool and unfair. It’s not right and it should have never happened. The aforementioned snow day also sucked donkey.
That’s a good Bingo! This mean yes, I agree with that. You are correct, sir.
For all the Catholics out there, wouldn’t it be awesome to go to Communion and when the priest said, “Body of Christ” you replied “That’s a good Bingo, Father,” then popped the host into your mouth? I don’t think he would be amused but I would love to do it just once.
The Cardiogirl Empire/the empire This blog, where I virtually live and breathe. I have a butler named Jeeves here at the Empire and he’s tip top. He also speaks with a British accent. I need to give that man a raise.
I snagged this phrase from Becky who refers to her place as the Hambox Empire. I was looking for something regal and another one of my clutch dawgs came through for me.
The Cardiogirl Manor/the manor The Manor is my brick and mortar house in the Mitten State. Unfortunately, reality — which is not nearly as fun as virtual reality — prevails at the Manor.