NaNoWriMo update: I kicked week one’s ass back to Saturday
You’ve probably noticed I’m trying to write 50,000 words this month. Most days on this blog I write 1,000 words just telling you about how much Kmart pisses me off when they refuse to carry Fuji apples.
Yes, again with the apples. However, I am still in the midst of a torrid love affair with the Honeycrisp so I’m not as angry anymore. Cool beans.
So I know I can be verbose and that is what’s fueling a large part of my confidence. I’m a rambling betch. The hard part is trying to make those 50,000 words sing in a coherent, linear fashion. And that is the part that has stopped me for a long, long time.
But Nervous Nelly’s fraternal twin Ms. Bitch-A-Lot frequently pipes up when I travel the internet and see so many other bloggers out there who have actually published books. Not self-published, but actual book deals from publishers like HarperCollins or Random House.
I think most bloggers feel the same way I do.
I like blogging.
I like writing.
And I enjoy hanging out at Barnes & Nobel.
Ergo I’d like to see a wildly successful book published with my name on the front cover.
Anyway, I decided 2009 was the year to jump into the project and part of that was making myself accountable to my peeps. When I first outed myself by sharing this dream with you all, I was nervous and apprehensive. There’s a
ton
o’ psychological
trail mix that
contributes to
that anxiety but I won’t bore you the details right now.
What I will tell you is that I am having so much fun doing this.
One of the main reasons is that I thrive on competition and I like to see measurable results. But equally important is the encouragement I’ve received from my buddies — you folks. No one told me to suck it everyone was very positive and that was great.
But a very strange thing has happened in the last ten days.
Nervous Nelly has all but left the building and a long-lost triplet showed up in her place. Her name is Perseverance but she lets me call her Agent P. She has a 1,000-watt smile and she gives me Gold Stars all day long. She also pumps me up when I start to wonder if I can really do this.
Best of all, she jumps off the couch and channels Jules from Pulp Fiction when Nelly starts to whine. Agent P gets in Nelly’s face and screams, “Say. What. Again!” on a regular basis. When Nelly starts to tell me this is just a pipe dream P kicks her to the curb.
She loves me unconditionally and has complete faith in me; there’s really no arguing with her since she refuses to accept my sarcasm. She won’t hear of it.
She’s a breath of fresh air. And when Perseverance is at my side the sun shines brightly, my legs are tan — I’m even at my ideal body weight, squee! — and I’m sporting a brand new pair of low tops. It’s my own Converse Utopia.
Now Ms. Bitch-A-Lot does pop in from time to time, but she hasn’t made Perseverance trigger happy just yet.
So an unexpected side effect of following this dream of mine has been a large boost in confidence. I’m almost drunk with the feeling. And that’s such an unexpected sensation for me. I really don’t think anyone can say anything to bring me down.
Hang on, P just corrected me. There’s nothing anyone can say to bring me down, she said making sure to issue a crazy scream ala Howard Dean at the post-caucus rally in Iowa.
Final Analysis: I’m one week closer to getting my first novel published.
Tags: Things that actually make me happy
Woo hoo! Good for you and Agent P! Can’t wait to say “I knew you when…”
Thanks Michelle! (Look at that I can — and will — take a compliment!)
I just have this image of my mind of Sally Field in that movie where she’s all fightin’ mad for or against unions. Which one is that??? Ugh, I don’t remember. All I remember is her fightin’ mad face holding some sign up and signaling the world that SHE IS HERE, DAMMIT!
Go, CG! You’ve got a book in you girl, now get back to writing! Go! Go! Go! Go!
I do believe that was Norma Rae, although Bumbles can verify that for me.
Hoo-ahhhh~!~
YES!!!
Send good juju towards Hubs today. He’s catching a flight in Detroit this morning to head to Tokyo. I’m sure P has got it covered.
I love seeing you with this attitude. Good for you.
I love that and shall start using “good juju” and its evil twin “bad juju” immediately! But your hubs only gets good/awesome juju today all the way from Motown to Tokyo!!
Why is he going Tokyo, btw?
Fun. You’ve got good juju coming out of your ears right now ~!~
Work. He’ll be back on Friday.
Yikes that’s an intense business trip — going that far from Tuesday til Friday. I hope his jet lag isn’t too bad.
Yeah, I’m totally thrilled. He starts flying back tomorrow. More good juju.
Holy p***. 35,000 words?! That is awesome.
I won’t even say where I’m at, but I got in 2,000 yesterday, so I’m a little less behind than I was.
Are you gonna go for 100,000 words this month? I bet you could do that.
Not sure what p*** means, but I’ll take it! But just betwixt you and me, I am shooting for 100K, just to see if I can do it. Nothing ventured, nothing gained, right?
RIGHT!
Well, it rhymes with “bliss”.
Good luck with the 100k. No, I’m not jealous at all. :)
Laughs at the interesting juxtaposition of p*** versus bliss.
Initially I thought it was a gangsta way of say ph^ck. But I guess not.
This really is a fun adventure; it must be the right time for me.
I have to agree enthusiastically. Wow! I say it again backwards, Wow! This Nano thing is amazingly brilliant. I am loving the experience and must thank you profusely for blazing the trail ahead of me. Every day when I check your word count, it moves me to head back to my novel and churn out more words.
Plus, I am finding that pressing towards the goal isn’t really turning out crap for me. Instead, by freeing my internal editor, I am able to plow through and not slow down to a speed which accomodates stopping. If I don’t know a location where a character is or was, I just write “wherever” and go right on.
I can’t wait for you to read my novel. Chris Baty tells me that I shouldn’t do that, so I will hold off. Still, I’m excited for that … one day.
Keep churnin’ out the words, CG. Keep motivating the rest of us to plow ahead as well. And never let go of Agent P!
Snaps on Wow backwards, Wendy! Booyah!
I have to say right back at you, I really cannot believe the timing of your email to me — you and strugglingwriter really have pushed me out of my comfort zone and for that I’m thankful.
I feel the same way — my IE is bound and gagged in the stock room trying to content himself by proofreading the labels on the cans of soup back there. Punk.
And I’m also struggling with wanting to have Mr. C and a select few others read what I have so far. But I will wait. Anxiously.
“A-gent-P!” have you ever watched Phineas and Ferb? Their platypus (named Perry) is a “secret agent”, and when he’s in that mode, his name is Agent P. Whenever he changes from a mere pet into a secret agent, the voiceover sings “A-gent-P!”
And yes, I have been known to suddenly belt out that one phrase at random, at full volume.
Sorry for the wild tangent there :)
Your Agent P sounds like a pretty good member of the Cardiogirl Cabinet! (Cabinet in the political sense).
Shhh, that’s exactly what I was thinking when I wrote Agent P. I do love that show, in fact I asked for the Phineas and Ferb [Enhanced] Soundtrack for Christmas. Just $9.99 and in stock at Amazon.
(stops to hum, “Squirrel, squirrel. There’s a squirrel in my pants!”)
I love the sound of the Cardiogirl Cabinet! Agent P (both the original and the inspired-by version) have to be the co-heads of the Secret Service.
OMG the Medium Boy has imprinted on the “Squirrel In My Pants” song. That, interspersed with “This used to be a funhouse, now it’s filled with evil clowns….” My son, the musical smorgasbord. I really stopped in to say, “Go, CG, go CG, you can do it, it’s your birthday…” and all that. Woohoo. I signed up for the blog every day in November challenge and promptly let it fall to the bottom of the pool. Ahhh, me.
Ok then, I don’t feel so bad about admitting that I am getting that exact soundtrack “for my kids” for Christmas. Actually, I am buying them the CD so that I can download it into my ipod and they can keep the disc. It’s a win-win! Squirrels in My Pants is indeed a classic, but we musn’t forget the upbeat musical stylings of Backyard Beach and Phinedroids and Ferbots!
I swear when this show comes on, I will put just about anything aside to stop and watch it with my boys.
If I ever get another animal, I’m naming it Perry. Regardless of gender.
@Elle I’ve never heard the funhouse thing, but Google suggests that’s a song by Pink. And Youtube is graciously playing it for me right now.
This does feel like my birthday and I do love my b-day. Thanks Elle!
@Soonerchick I have to say I really love all of their songs and the episode that made me want the CD was Dude, We’re Gettin’ the Band Back Together …
Remember when they were trying to get Love Handle back together? It was the guy in the library who’s got not rhythm. Also the guy in the salon who’s fabulous.
I must have those songs while I am toiling away on the elliptical.
I love the idea of a cat or dog named Perry, but I stand by my original statement of getting a cat when my oldest kid moves out of the house with her asthma and naming it Gary (ala SpongeBob.)
But maybe we’ll get two and name them Gary and Perry. Now that would be awesome.
Hey CG! Sorry I haven’t been in the lounge that much lately, life has been absolutely, positively friggin nuts here! I love Agent P and think you should just let her do away with NN and MBA once and for all (I’m sure Jules can give her some ideas…lol).
You only need positive people in your cabinet. Criticism is allowed but it must be constructive not destructive!
Congrats on your writing progress, I’m sure you will reach and exceed your goal and actually your expectations as well! I had no doubt that you would definitely rise to this challenge. If you are still playing MW, let me know what you want since I did promise you rewards for your success. If you’re no longer playing, I’ll think of something else.
Btw, I have started what I promised you and hopefully will finish it today or tomorrow. Sorry!!
I knew you’d come back as the esteemed Buf, Esquire! (Jumps up and down crazily and gives you a chest bump that you didn’t expect and then apologizes profusely for knocking you down and giving you a goose egg in the process.)
Congratulations!
Buff passed the NJ Bar Exam and she is a bona fide lawyer!
Can I get an amen?!
No worries on your project, I can wait for months. Forgive me Godfather, I haven’t been back to my Mafia Family in a while. But it was fun and very addictive.
I am proud of the bodies I’ve collected.
congrats buf. i knew you would pass.
Thanks Nat! :)
Amen (blushing and trying to hide in the corner). lol….Thanks!
Also, I’m pretty sure I will win if you ever give me a chest bump unexpectedly, physics is on my side…lol :)
(laughs) You’re welcome Buf.
Eeeeeeee!
See that? That was a squeal of total delight for you. Keep going! I can’t wait to read the first Cardiogirl novel!
Thanks Dom, it really is a great feeling to ride this creative train. And I have to admit, I can’t wait for you to read my first novel.
WTG! You rock!
I’m doing the Blog Every Day version (NaBloPoMo & NaBloWriMo). And I’m sort of experiencing the same feeling that you’re feeling. Also, I feel as though my post quality has gone up a notch. But, as you can see, my comment quality is still pretty lame. :)
Anyway, I hope to check your book out from the library soon! :)
Isn’t that cool, SPG? I did give that a whirl a couple years ago and I think I got close but no cigar.
However, there’s something really helpful about pushing out quantity in an effort to hone quality. Keep on truckin’ brutha.
WOOT!!! Way to go, CG! I love that you’re getting more and more self-confident. That can only lead you to bigger and better things. Question, though: Do ya think you can rent out Perseverance to the rest of us when you’re done with her?
And re: Elle’s comment — GREAT. Now I have Funhouse stuck in MY head.
Man I am late to the party regarding this Funhouse thing. I’ve never heard it before today although I have heard of Pink.
You know, I think I’m going to be greedy and keep Perseverance at my side for a long while, but I’ll bet she has a sister.
Go on and do your book thang! I just have one question… How it the world do you manage the dedication of writing a book, along with writing your blog, at the same time?
Work your MoJo!
(Jumps and gives you a virtual high five.)
You know, LaTonya, I think it’s a combination of adrenaline and caffeine. But I will admit there’s not much food in the fridge and the house and laundry are, uh, suffering greatly.
But once I get my advance I’ll let the new maid deal with that stuff :)
The euphoria of confidence that you describe makes me think of the SNL short – “I’m On A Boat.”
Oh, Agent P totally has a nautical themed pashmina afghan and some flippie floppies.
@Bumbles Stay on your mother f-ing toes! I’m on a BOAT!
I might have to buy that song and put it on my playlist although I would worry that my kid would find it…
@Liz I’m with you on the pashmina but you know how I feel about flip flops…
Agent P has awesomely comfortable flip flops because everything she does is just that cool. And you can’t wear Converse low tops on a boat. Everyone knows that.
Liz, Liz. Agent P’s feet are very sensitive and she’s never been able to get used to that thong thing between her toes.
Besides, can you stop short, pivot and turn in a flip flop without screaming in pain? No. You cannot.
I mustAgent P must be able to stop on a dime and go Cobra Kai in order to fight evil.I really have no idea what kind of flip flops you’ve been exposed to but I’m sad for you as you are sad for my dislike of Seinfeld.
Part of me wants to buy you a pair of my $25 flip flops. They last years and years. And the thong is cloth or leather.
I was just suggesting Agent P can wear whatever she wants and it works because she’s just got that much mojo.
You know what’s funny, Liz? I actually remember the last pair I wore and I was a mere sprite of about seven or eight.
They were from Kmart and the sole — the top of it where my foot rested, not the extreme bottom that trod upon the floor — was made of fake bamboo. Do you know what I mean?
The strap part was navy blue and puffy suede. Or something that was supposed to be suede. I got a blister. I hated those things.
Aaaand scene.
Now I feel my dogs can’t pull off flip flops, but I can do an open toe band gig. You know the band that goes across and allows all of the sausages to rest together side-by-side?
But Agent P is her own chick who is teaching me new tricks, so perhaps she’s got an expensive, high-quality pair of flops waiting in the wings for Summer 2010.
And I must reiterate: AND IT’S ONLY THE 10TH. . . !!!
Hey, check out this fascinating piece about how great novelists get the work done:
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748703740004574513463106012106.html
Hoo-ahhh!
You are a wealth of knowledge Tracy, I’m so glad I found you! I want to be like Richard Powers lounging in bed. But that image totally makes me think of Marlon Brando sprawled, almost trapped, in his bed and that’s not cool.
So maybe I want to be more like Colum McCann and read my own draft in Central Park. What a great article, Tracy. If you don’t mind, you shall become my version of Google for writers…
you are a writing machine!!! and funny as L too! i loved this post cg. you are so entertaining.
cough. cough.
i’m choking my own smoke here, excuse me. lol.
oh and i want an autographed copy of your book please.
Thank you Natural. Man, I’m so surprised how easy it is to take a compliment today.
And naturally you and my peeps get an autographed copy. I might have to sign it Cardiogirl, though.
And then I’ll add aka My Secret Agent Name which is cloaked in secrecy by you and a handful of other VIPers.
Hola CG,
I so miss reading your blog everyday it’s like my secret chocolate without the calories….sometimes real life sucks monkey b*lls. Anyway I am soooooo super duper overthrilled excited about one day walking into my trusty Barnes and seeing a new release with your signature.
Keep up the amazing work and hi-fives all around for Agent P!!!!
YES! (Pumps fist in the air massively and then gingerly rubs the strained cartilage in her elbow.)
Thanks Faith, you filled my motivation tank. And that’s awesome.
[...] Agent P is still next to me — sitting on top of the desk, swinging her legs back and forth — just waiting to pounce [...]